Tell me, why should I listen to you? Is it because you have something to say that's more important than anything I could have to say? (No.) Maybe it's because you're smarter than I am? (Not likely.) Or perhaps you are simply more interesting than I? (Nope, not that either.)
So, why should I listen to you? Here's why: Because I might learn something that will make me better, brighter, funnier, faster, smarter, even sexier. I should listen to you, because I'm interested in myself.
Sound crazy? Think again! The fact is that all of our brains go through this thought process—just not usually so specifically. That's why the most captivating of public speakers regularly start their speeches out with a question that's geared toward the audience (such as, "Who here is embarrassed by their middle name?") in order to hook our egos immediately and immerse us in the talk as if our lives, for the moment at least, depended on it.
Being a spectacular speaker means reaching out to your audience to talk about what interests them. But the true secret to really connecting with that audience is aligning what interests you—your true passion in life—to audience interests. If you're embarrassed by your own middle name, you can tell a tale or two about growing up, hiding your middle initial wherever possible or humorously fudging your middle name with hilarious results. Your audience will then laugh—not at you, but with you, as they recognize elements of themselves in your truly captivating story.
So, why should you listen to me? Simple: You want to be a better communicator, and you feel connected to what I'm saying.
To make a big splash with your audience—whether it's a packed house or a cozy home—means finding common ground that you and they both can share and indwell for as long as you're speaking. After all, not everyone is automatically as good at listening as you are.
© KiKi Productions, Inc. 2009
Showing posts with label listening. Show all posts
Showing posts with label listening. Show all posts
Sep 4, 2009
TRULY SPEAKING/WEEKLY UPDATE: Truly Listening
This week, I made a decision that affected the blog: After weeks (and in one case, months) of attempting to get together with two different friends in neighboring cities, I re-prioritized and committed to commuting to visit them—two days in a row in different directions—even though it meant I wouldn't have mid-week blog time. Seeing my friends, connecting with them face to face, was just that important to me.
One friend is about to move much farther away—to Dallas, Texas—from Chicago. While I have the chance, I want to take advantage of our shared time, so I drove the hour-plus to lunch with her on Wednesday (and then treat ourselves to girly pedicures!).
The other is a childhood friend with whom I've been in touch to varying degrees since we met in the first grade. Our life schedules have been so hectic over the past year that we've missed out on our usual holiday-centered visits in our hometown. So, I drove two hours to Indianapolis where we met for an early dinner, explored the city's refurbished downtown, then treated ourselves to a little sale-based shopping spree.
Both visits had one prime focal point: conversation. I lingered over lunch in Chi-town and dawdled over dinner in Indy; wherever we were, we two (both sets) talked and talked and talked. We may have been trying on blue jeans or testing out toe nail polish colors, but somehow we managed to interweave deeper subject matter, things that really touched our hearts, into every conversation. And even more importantly, we listened to each other.
One testament to true friendship is listening. An important part of truly listening is making eye contact—something that just can't be replicated over the telephone or in text and e-mail messages. In a time when success is so rarely measured by how many true, deep friendships one shares, listening is key for life success in many areas—from personal relationships to work-based ones. How well do you listen? And just how do you know ...?
© KiKi Productions, Inc. 2009
One friend is about to move much farther away—to Dallas, Texas—from Chicago. While I have the chance, I want to take advantage of our shared time, so I drove the hour-plus to lunch with her on Wednesday (and then treat ourselves to girly pedicures!).
The other is a childhood friend with whom I've been in touch to varying degrees since we met in the first grade. Our life schedules have been so hectic over the past year that we've missed out on our usual holiday-centered visits in our hometown. So, I drove two hours to Indianapolis where we met for an early dinner, explored the city's refurbished downtown, then treated ourselves to a little sale-based shopping spree.
Both visits had one prime focal point: conversation. I lingered over lunch in Chi-town and dawdled over dinner in Indy; wherever we were, we two (both sets) talked and talked and talked. We may have been trying on blue jeans or testing out toe nail polish colors, but somehow we managed to interweave deeper subject matter, things that really touched our hearts, into every conversation. And even more importantly, we listened to each other.
One testament to true friendship is listening. An important part of truly listening is making eye contact—something that just can't be replicated over the telephone or in text and e-mail messages. In a time when success is so rarely measured by how many true, deep friendships one shares, listening is key for life success in many areas—from personal relationships to work-based ones. How well do you listen? And just how do you know ...?
© KiKi Productions, Inc. 2009
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